Sunday, March 29, 2015

Home alone

So Walter and Ulises went to Spain for spring break! Hooray! I stayed here, at work... Boooo!

In just two days I get to go pick them up from the airport! To say I've missed them would be an understatement. I feel it in my bones. An emptiness. Kind of like I've lost a bit of my identity. I've not been in a position like this in years. No diapers to change, family dinner to cook, no one else to prepare or do stuff for. I've tried to make the best of it but I can't celebrate my "freedom" too much when I still have to go to work and my budget hasn't exactly increased to the extent my free time has.

I've gone to the gym classes I don't usually have the ability to attend and I've gone out with some friends ( thank you!!) and done some shopping, but that's not a fair exchange for the giggles and kisses Walter and Ulises bring.

I had to stay to work. I work to maintain health insurance and the company I work for would have cut off my benefits if I went under my designated amount of hours. So I stayed. I was a big girl and decided to remain employed and insured instead of partying in Spain.

I'm looking for a different solution for our family right now. I could go work for another company and get better benefits and a higher salary, but the joy that I get being so close to Walter and spending my day next to him while I work is invaluable. So I'm looking at work from home options or something. I'm trying to stay positive and look at this in perspective. Ulises will finish his PhD in just 2 years and will likely be employed somewhere where he can insure the rest of his family members for a reasonable rate. And then I would have the option to work for pleasure or stay at home or a combination of both.

Good news is that Ulises will get his student visa status adjusted to permanent resident soon and his restrictions on work will be lifted. And that will happen this year, not in two years!

So I'm trying to be patient. I do lement that I missed Ulises sister's wedding-- what looked like a simply  beautiful event-- in Spain. I also missed the time I could have spent there with Ulises family and our friends. It was really hard feeling so left out. While they celebrated, I helped toddlers glue cotton balls on construction paper. Ah the glamour of working daycare!

Sometimes it's hard being an adult.

But really, I'm glad they went. I've cried everyday since they've been gone, but Walter is being loved by all his aunts uncles and grandparents there. It's the best gift I can give them. I hope they see how hard this was for me and give him so much more love because of it!

So here is hoping we can go to Spain at Christmas. And here is hoping work requirements won't derail that dream.

And now, for some pictures! This is what I have been living off of while they have been away!